And now, and forever

And now I’m lost
And now I’m alone
But I don’t care
‘Cause I’ve always been

And now I’m in silence
And all those things… Don’t make any sense
I’m walking
And thinking
So many things to say
But can’t hear even a world

Snow and rain
Blood and tears
All forsaken
All forgotten
Sorrow and lamentation
Dirges
I’m not here
I’m dead
I’m alive, somehow

I’m still in the darkness
And here I know what I really am
Nothing
But I don’t care
‘Cause I’ve always been

Who would say, one day, I’d have a reason?
And who would say, one day, this reason would disappear like a flame of a candle?
I’m alone

I’m just a ghost of what I was once a time
But a ghost can be alive
A ghost can have dreams
…A shadow can have feelings
I feel…
Nothing here is real
But I finally don’t care
Cause nothing never has been

I’ve never been something

I live in the darkness
Hiding my sorrow
Ignoring my pain
No one cares
Why would I?

This solitary tear running through my face…
Doesn’t matter
No one can see it
No one ever will see it

And finally I die
But I died others thousand times
I’ll never learn

Maybe that’s the real beauty of the feelings
They can change
But they’re always the same